What are we going to do about Mom and Dad? Part 1

My siblings and I are in the process of exploring options for my aging parents as it becomes more and more apparent their days of living independently are numbered.  Now 86 and 85, they have lived in their own home and managed all their daily living requirements with little to no assistance from us.  More and more frequently they express feeling overwhelmed by the same tasks they've, up until now, managed without a whimper.  It's becoming obvious that something will need to be done.  My two sisters and I live driving distance away; close enough to be there in a day, too far away to be of daily assistance.  My two brothers live closer by and have been available for the occasional help with driving when needed and to help with repairs my father would have managed once upon a time.   Regretably, the ever increasing demands my parents have put on their lives has reached a breaking point.  As we begin to explore options for their remaining years, we are quickly realizing that, short of keeping them in their home, their options are expensive and limited.  Understanding that moving our elders from their familiar surroundings can in itself be debilitating, we're hoping to keep them as close to what's familiar as possible.  That in itself limits options.  The small town we grew up in (and where they still live) has one retirement/assisted living option and one nursing home option.  Neither is appealing.  The retirement/assisted living option is a lovely country club like setting but VERY expensive, and laden with hidden (with what I forsee as) complications.   They're too healthy, too viable for a nursing home.  What to do?   I'm 92 pages into Jane Gross's 2011 book,  A Bittersweet Season.  Her firsthand account of her and her brother's trip through the maze of elder care is eyeopening and frightening.  The good news is that her experience, her research, is information we can use to hopefully avoid some of the pitfalls they encountered during their mother's final years.   Over the next few weeks, I'll continue to write about my experience determining and implementing what to do about Mom and Dad.